by Alan Alexander-Manifold
When I first came to NOTIS I was a skeptic, blind;
I thought that if I focussed the efforts of my mind
On automation problems they'd soon be overcome;
I look back now and shake my head--how could I be so dumb?
The NOTIS folks said calmly, "Conversion's what you need!"
Convert I did and now I am of the NOTIS creed;
I swoon when Pastor Jane Burke stands up and starts to preach,
And I accept on faith whatever dogma she might teach.
Within my office, row on row of NOTIS scripture stands,
You'll rarely find me without one or more in my hands,
And almost every day I call the office up on Church
To ask the monks and sisters to assist my spiritual search.
And when my interaction with the holy LMS
Has ended for the day I go home and must confess
I eat my bread and pour myself a large and potent brew,
And on my knees I thank the Lord . . . that none of this is true!