If I Had A Phone

by Alan Manifold

10/13/1995

(to the tune of If I Had A Hammer)

           C Em F     G             C Em F  G
If I had a phone, I'd scream in the morning,
                  C       D             G
I'd scream in the evening, all over the world;
                 C         F    G           Am F G
I'd scream about bug fixes, I'd scream about abends,
                  F        C      F            C
I'd scream out of love for all my fellow NOTIS users,
F C G           C     [G F G C G F G]
All -- over the world.

If I had a fax machine, I'd fax in the morning,
I'd fax in the evening, all over the world;
I'd fax about bug fixes, I'd fax about abends,
I'd fax out of love for all my fellow NOTIS users,
All -- over the world.

If I had a LISTSERV, I'd mail in the morning,
I'd mail in the evening, all over the world;
I'd mail about bug fixes, I'd mail about abends,
I'd mail out of love for all my fellow NOTIS users,
All -- over the world.

Well, I've got a phone, and I've got a fax machine,
And I've got NOTIS-L, all over the world;
I use the phone for anger, I use the fax for details,
And the list is for the love between my fellow NOTIS users,
All -- over the world.