Elsevier

by Alan Manifold

2 May 2000

(to the tune of Camelot)

Spoken:
It's true, it's true, Endeavor has sold out
The buyer's one we'd rather do without


Our business plan has been in place for years now
Excessive prices we must never fear
And there's no limit to how high we'll go now
At Elsevier

All discounts are forbidden until Christmas
Expiring at the finish of the year
And in that week we're not conducting business
At Elsevier

Elsevier, Elsevier
We know you think we charge too much
But at Elsevier, Elsevier
We call it, "going Dutch"

We up the prices every time we're able
Computed by how many gripes we hear
So give a hearty cheer and make it sound sincere
Or you may get our "special pricing" here at Elsevier

Elsevier, Elsevier
The only Force we know is Dark
So at Elsevier, Elsevier
We tremble at a SPARC

Your faculty produce the stuff we publish
And they won't let you cancel us, that's clear
So give a hearty cheer and make it sound sincere
Or you may get our "special pricing" here at Elsevier